Kind of Like a Train Wreck or Seeing is Believing

You know how we have that instinct built into us? The one that causes us to keep looking at an accident, even though we don't really want to look. But we can't make ourselves turn away.

Jerry and I experienced that in a way this weekend. Same concept, different circumstance. We went to St. Louis to help move my Mom. And even though it was a horrible, awful experience, we can't quit talking about it. So allow me to talk some more.

Seeing is believing... I will attempt to describe some things here, but without seeing it for yourself, you will think I am exaggerating. Cross my heart, I am not.

We moved my Mom from her 2 bedroom apartment to a much nicer 2 bedroom apartment. Nicer, but smaller. The new complex is for 55 and over, all one level, brand spanking new. Very nice. But smaller.

My sister knew it was smaller and she tried to tell my Mom that she needed to downsize. You see, my Mom is a hoarder. She did not have this disease when we were children. It began about 8 years ago, at least that is my guess. And it is only getting worse.

Keep in mind that my Mom lives alone, in a small 2 bedroom apartment. She goes virtually nowhere. She hits the grocery store about once a week, the doctor about once a week, and every garage sale within a 75 mile radius (okay - I did exaggerate that one). She doesn't really have any visitors. I have a cousin who checks on her a couple times a week. She has a friend who she goes to lunch with about once every 2 months. My Mom wears the same 3 shirts over and over. Are you getting the picture? She is 73 and basically does not have a life. This is the life she has carved for herself though. Choices she has made.

Here is some of what we found:
*5 toilet bowl brushes (yes, only 1 toilet)
*15-20 empty plastic peanut butter jars
*2.5 loaves of bread (one woman, that much bread would go moldy in my house of 4)
*a drawer full of nylons (When asked, her response was "for when I go to church". She doesn't.)
*25-30 turtle neck shirts (in a drawer)
*30 - 35 sleeveless shirts (in a different drawer)
*an entire drawer full of belts, most from the 80's
*5 plastic buckets with lids, in her back bedroom, and she did not know what was in them
*10 plastic buckets with lids, in her back closet, many of them had wrapped glassware, votives
*25 pairs of jeans
*2 large, large closets completely full of hanging clothes (more than my entire family owns)
*about 10 pair of white tennis shoes, most look new
*several pair of high heel, dressy prom-type shoes - the woman can barely walk in tennies
*wall pictures stored behind and under her couch because there was no wall space left for hanging
*15 boxes of Jiffy corn mix, all expired
*some over-the-counter meds that expired in 2003, and some in 1999
*several enemas, even though she takes meds for diarrhea (sorry if that is TMI)
*a washed out bag with holes, the kind that holds grapes in the produce section
*used Ziploc bags in most every room, several of these
*a large jar of buttons, she hasn't sown in years - can't even see well enough to sew
*a box of 8 track tapes
*more make up than my sister and I have used in the last 5 years
*about 25 bottles of various types of lotion
*an entire cabinet of jewelry, like a stand up cabinet
*also a drawer with jewelry stored in egg cartons (remember - she goes nowhere)
*12 curling irons

Okay, I am tired of recalling all the stuff we saw. This is only scraping the top. You would not believe it unless you saw it. It made for the MOST stressful 2 days of my life. No kidding. No exaggerating. I could physically fell the stress taking over my body. And the stress wasn't just because she has so much stuff, but because she wasn't willing to get rid of any of it. There was no physical way it would all possibly fit into the new apartment. There was much gnashing of teeth, and several moments of near weeping.

I am grateful that she isn't a 'paper saver.' I've heard of people hoarding junk mail and newspapers for decades. Thank goodness my Mom doesn't do that. I am sure this stems from growing up poor, but she didn't do this when she was younger. It is like she is a little child again, very unreasonable and doesn't comprehend what is being told to her. She also got delusional on me and I didn't do very good in being patient.

My adoring daughter gets the award for bringing the best comical relief. My Mom had a wall picture stored under her couch. It is one of about 5 little cherub angels with wings and all their genitalia showing. I tried to tell my Mom how unscriptural that picture was, but it was really a waste of my breath. When Maddie unloaded all the pictures at the new place, she set them all up on the front porch as a sort of art show. That is because there was no room in the apartment. But in an effort to keep things PG-rated, she took some blue tape and applied it to the picture to give those angels some pants. That made me laugh!